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Our inability to ask the right questions or even ask any questions at all is the very thing that is coming back to bite us further down when the person is acting out these behaviours and we feel bewildered.

If they have trouble keeping it in check, they’re irrational, violent, and a bit too handy with their fists, be careful that you don’t end up being a human punchbag or being emotionally abused.

It’s important to note that we all make a massive effort when we first meet someone but that ultimately we can’t help but slip into our natural selves within the first few dates, plus we can’t control situations and life, which means we get put to the test and inadvertently reveal our true selves.

This is something that the other party does which flags a potential problem either then or further down the line.

This is another narcissistic trait: the belief that only his or her feelings and opinions are valid, and that differences pose a threat. The person talks on and on about himself or herself and doesn't ask much about you, or is uninterested when you do talk about yourself. This person is not interested in you or your feelings.

He or she just wants you to keep your attention on them. The person is an older man or woman who has never been married and has been in a series of broken relationships, or has had numerous broken marriages. Abandoning one's children -- other than giving up a baby for adoption -- may indicate lack of empathy.

People have a nasty habit of wearing rose-tinted glasses when they date someone and witness various red flags which they fail to acknowledge and act upon.

Unless this person has had a good amount of therapy and personal growth since the last relationship, a series of broken relationships or marriages may indicate that he or she doesn't know how to have a loving relationship. The person was abused as a child and has not had therapy or done sufficient inner healing work. Without an openness to learning about themselves and you when there is conflict, there is no way to resolve conflict. The person participates in addictions that are unacceptable to you -- smoking, drinking, drugs, addictive eating, gambling, TV and so on.

We all bring our unhealed wounds with us into our primary relationships, often projecting our parents or other caregivers onto our partner. Again, don't expect that you can get the person to change.

I can see that no one has ever really seen you." For many narcissists, the pursuit is everything and once they have you hooked, they are either off to another pursuit, or they become more and more demanding of you. The person becomes angry, critical or withdrawn if you say no. Narcissists need constant attention and often become very upset and punishing if you don't give them what they want. The person becomes logical and tries to talk you out of your feelings or your experience.

He or she tries to make you feel that you are wrong for your feelings or your position.




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