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“I really enjoyed dating people who identify as fat fetishists,” Ospina says.For her, it simply meant knowing her size would never be an issue.It’s not a level playing field, and there’s no point pretending it is.But having a larger body is not a deal-breaker — though it may seem so.The bad news is, dating always comes with a certain amount of BS, no matter what your size. “We know there exists plenty of fat shaming and fat biases in this world,” Ospina says.The good news is, your size doesn’t matter as much as you think it does. The Anti-Diet Project is an ongoing series about intuitive eating, sustainable fitness, and body positivity. “And people often will disregard a potential partner based on weight.” This is a grim fact, and while it’s not the only fact, it’s not helpful to ignore it entirely.“I had an instant knowledge that they wouldn’t just be okay with my body. They loved everything that we’re told are flaws about my body, be it the stretch marks or the rolls or the cellulite.” “I’ve had really lovely experiences dating on fat-specific websites,” Ospina adds.“For me, it felt very safe.” But she understands that others just aren’t comfortable, and stresses that it’s just as doable to find good matches on mainstream sites (and, you know, IRL — as she met her current partner). There’s an assumption in dating, particularly online, that first impressions are mostly fake.

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It also changes your perception on the world around you.

You can follow Kelsey's journey on Twitter and Instagram at @mskelseymiller, or right here on Facebook. “There are people with whom you might get along great, on a base level — on a spiritual level, an emotional level — who might just have those biases,” she adds.

But it’s their loss, because: “I hope that there are also an equal number of people who don’t.

Confidence changes the way people see you — and the way you see them.

Confidence is like highlighter for your whole persona; it makes everyone seem charismatic and look as if they’ve stepped into professional lighting.

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La Morgese, 60, who lives in New Jersey but dates in Manhattan, goes by “Sandy” when she meets new men.

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My rules for first time text are to: Let’s say that you have text this person after the first date or maybe two or three dates and gotten no response.