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Emotions will likely come up that she never knew she harbored. As far as your friends go, unless they know her friend better than you do, I would ignore their advice. The gay woman’s perspective: Jody Fischer It’s funny, lesbians are notorious for dating friends of their exes and exes of their exes. Let me ask you to answer the following question to see if you’re really ready for this: What are you most concerned about here?A) Protecting yourself B) Ruining the friendship between the two girls C) Having them compare notes on you and how you kiss D) All of the above If you selected D, congratulations—that’s the correct answer! C) If you think that they won’t talk about you, you’re wrong. They may discuss your assets, but I’m guessing they will spend more time talking about your ass and other intimate info. I don’t care how buddy-buddy you are with her now, unless she’s super evolved, she’ll feel badly that she couldn’t make it work with you and that her friend may be able to.To most looking in, Rebecca Bunch has a great life: a high powered job as an attorney in a prestigious New York law firm, great future prospects in her chosen profession, looks, brains, and money.But she has always suffered from anxiety and depression, for which she is on a plethora of pills.

You get a few points for asking your ex if it’s okay. From the way you describe it, you can go out with her friend! Your friendship with your ex will never get off the ground—at least not until you stop dating her friends.And perhaps more importantly, you’ll be shunned and given skeezy asshole status by her protective posse of friends (as you should be), which means that minus her one rogue friend who’s actually dumb enough to go out with you, you’ll never date anyone else in her circle—or even six degrees of her circle.It might cause a little tension between her and her friend, but for the most part, we ladies stick together.She’s got a friend I’ve always found really attractive, and recently the friend mentioned to my ex-girlfriend that she’s interested in me too.My ex says she’s okay with it if we go out, but a couple of my girl friends tell me that I shouldn’t even consider asking her out, no matter what my ex-girlfriend says, so I’m not sure what to do. —TM, Los Angeles, California The straight man’s perspective: Chris Kennedy I’m not a big believer in having a lot of dating rules, but I do hold true to the Golden Dating Rule—do unto significant others as you’d have done to you. Not literally—I’m not recommending fetishes—but see things from her perspective on this.




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