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This usually happens right after the guy had a great date with a girl he really likes… Just always ASSUME that you will plan everything and keep asking her out until she offers something better or asks you out FIRST (which is a really good thing…if she’s asking you out one-on-one, that’s a very strong signal of genuine interest in the beginning stages…and even if a woman is highly interested she STILL might not ask you out…which doesn’t matter if she keeps saying YES to your offers, showing up and having FUN, and kisses you back with enthusiasm…) Why should you never text or say this DANGEROUS phrase to a woman? It takes all the fun out of her wondering if you’re going to ask her out again. Listen, if she’s wondering if you’ll ask her out again, she’s thinking about you. So put yourself out there and see how she responds. Now, he has clients in 37 countries and counting and is the author of the "Attract and Keep Her" best-selling dating and relationship system for men.At the end of the date, or shortly after, he says or texts her this gem: “When can we see each other again? It stops her from projecting all kinds of amazing traits onto you…her potential new man. And the more times she THINKS about you in-between dates, the higher her interest in you climbs. What matters is that you took the risk to put your plan out there and offer it to her. And then put yourself out there again the next time something like this comes up. Ironically during our dinner, Ad Man did ask how my writing was going. He was completely unaware that he was ever the subject matter of my work. I told him it wasn’t easy writing about dating after divorce, there was more drama than resolution. “No one ever likes to read about something good happening to someone.” He laughed. Back at the entrance to my hotel I clung on to hope. I always had a crush on you, and…I’m sorry.” “It’s fine.” I said avoiding eye contact. This is a mindfuck.” He didn’t respond and I didn’t expect him to. Don Draper would not have bothered with an apology dinner, he would have ghosted me altogether, a hard, clean break. ” Oddly enough, I’m still optimistic but guys, never offer dinner and a sunset to me, unless you’re ready for something more.He started the awkward convo, “I’m sorry I got weird on you.” He whined. Don Draper knew he was a player and in a way, that is more attractive than a wishy-washy breadcrumber.

The texts themselves would invariably be punctuated by baffling kissy-face and see-no-evil monkey emoji — the universal language offlirtation.

It’s a little bit insane how even SMALL mistakes, especially when it comes to something as silly as texting, can instantly turn a woman off FOREVER no matter how awesome you are. You want to build your relationship with her IN PERSON.

You see it all the time in movies and TV shows, which is probably why guys think it might be a good idea (it’s NOT…). Now, if you ask her to meet up with you and she has a better idea, go with it. Which is 1/4 of why she starts liking you more over time. It’s her turn to participate in the creative process of dating at this point. Jim has been studying dating and relationships from the male perspective for over 12 years.

Towards the end of a relentless, freezing couple of months working in Portland, Oregon, a text came through from Ad Man. It turned out that by co-incidence I had planned a stop in LA to grab some warm weather on my way back to New York the very next week. We can watch the sunset, and go have some Italian.” His words seemed enthusiastic.

We hadn’t been in touch since our long-held friendship blossomed and we hooked up last December, after his divorce. Maybe he was coming out of his post-divorce slump and finally wanted to consider something more. I asked EVERY male I encountered over the next week.




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