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“Let’s say the average marriage is lasting roughly seven and a half years,” she says, “and roughly 40 percent of first marriages, and 60 percent of second marriages, end in divorce.So almost everybody coming out of college or high school knows people whose marriages have failed.According to a study by the National Marriage Project at Rutgers University, approximately 8.1 percent of households consist of unmarried heterosexual partners, with census numbers showing that, between 19, the number of unmarried partners increased tenfold.Generation Y-ers ages 18–29 represent a mere 8.9 percent of the married population of the U. Keep up with this story and more In years past, couples might have been married before quarrels developed, but as an increasingly higher premium is put on one’s capacity for personal growth, along with fear that marriage can lead so quickly to divorce, some younger couples try to sort through their issues of compatibility for years before heading to the altar.

Another responds that three months might be a bit soon: “Maybe after 6–9 months, it would be okay if you’re in a fairly serious, fast-paced relationship, though.” Writes another: “My boyfriend and I went to counseling as our first date! Michael Broder has worked with couples for more than 35 years, and sees therapy as an increasingly common and acceptable option for those in their late 20s and early 30s.

A 24-year-old in Austin, Texas, changes her Facebook status from “In a relationship” to “It’s complicated,” then comments that she plans to begin couples therapy.

Message boards abound with questions from those trying to navigate information about couples counseling.

“People who are ‘just dating’ rarely come to see a couples therapist.”When unmarried couples consult Ziff, she does not view them as any less serious than couples a generation or so earlier, who were quicker to marry and less likely to cohabit or date for long periods of time without marrying.

Instead, she views these unwed monogamists as a population hyperaware of the risks of tying the knot.




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